Gravity pulls waves closer to me
Murmuring in the small round rocks.
Gravity also pulls dead cells from my skin
Parts of me that kiss the earth.
I control neither.
I am afraid of going blind.
Yesterday you told me you loved me
And my body felt suddenly heavier.
I murmured back, “I love you, too.”
If I were a bird
I would always fly with the wind
Choosing ease over purpose
Choosing grace over direction.
I study the dissolution of clouds.
To me you are
An enigma of flesh
A puzzle of flesh
A challenge of flesh.
When I drive over a bridge
I am always afraid I will suddenly swerve
To purposefully crash through the guard rails
And fly, briefly, over open water.
My hands shake on bridges.
I close my eyes at sunsets and sunrises.
I need the solid blue of the day
Or the solid black of the night.
I think I am afraid of you.